Nesting In

Why should I hire a postpartum doula?
Most cultures outside the U.S. believe that an extended period of “nesting in” during the postpartum period has important benefits for a new mother and her infant. Science backs up this belief: it takes about six weeks for a woman’s internal organs and tissues to heal after she gives birth, and rest facilitates healing. Research also finds lower incidences of postpartum depression in mothers who nest in after giving birth.  This doesn’t mean they must rest in isolation, but it does mean they limit outside activities and relax at home.  It also means they eat well, stay warm, receive massages, and drink teas to rest, recover, rejuvenate, and stimulate lactation.  When a new mother is relieved of housework and extra stress, she is able to restore her energy and strength and focus on caring for her baby and herself.  This rest time helps establish a strong bond between mother and baby – the more rested a mother is, the more relaxed she will feel as she becomes more capable of caring for her infant.

What does a postpartum doula do?
The role of the postpartum doula is to be NEAR her families— She Nurtures, Educates, Assesses, and Refers.  It’s a fluid role. Some families simply need a non-judgmental ear, some extra emotional support, someone who will listen to the birth story and take photos of the family.  Other families need help with daily life— feeding the family, organizing and tidying the home, laundry, errands, helping mom and dad get a shower and a nap.  Still others need educational support with breastfeeding, infant and mother care—someone who keeps up with research and can offer evidence-based information and who knows all of the resources available in the community. Most families find that their doula provides all of these things, according to the family’s needs, and she keeps the lines of communication open.

The most important thing for you to remember is that your doula will be a net for you as your new family learns to just be. As you grow more comfortable with all of the jumps, the twists, the turns, soon you will find you no longer need a net.  It is the postpartum doula’s goal to gradually work herself out of the job.

What does a postpartum doula do at night? What is the difference between a night nurse and a doula?
A night nurse focuses solely on the baby. A postpartum doula also cares for the mother, the father, and any siblings.  Night nurses are often not knowledgeable about breastfeeding. Doulas are well-trained in breastfeeding and can provide guidance if problems or questions arise. A night nurse is not concerned with helping a family to help themselves, whereas that is the doula’s main goal.

Couldn’t I just hire a mother’s helper?
Again, a mother’s helper does not have the breastfeeding training that a doula has. Neither is she as equipped to offer emotional support. A mother’s helper wants to keep her job indefinitely whereas a doula wants to eventually make her presence unnecessary.

What is the “fourth trimester”?
Dr. James McKenna explains that when primitive women evolved to stand on two legs, the shape of the female pelvis became narrower and resulted in human babies being born 3-4 months earlier, before their heads grew too large to safely pass through the birth canal. Dr. Harvey Karp has popularized this concept with Happiest Baby on the Block: babies need their environments to simulate the womb so their brains and central nervous systems can continue to develop the way they would internally.  This time between birth and the end of the baby’s third month is a unique stage of life many now refer to as the “fourth trimester.”

Hormonal changes, stress, and sleep deprivation can be more acute for mothers during the fourth trimester. They may benefit from extra help and support during this time as they find their new (and constantly changing) normal.

I have a birth doula, so why would I need a postpartum doula?
Some birth doulas do also work as postpartum doulas. But typically birth doulas offer 1 postpartum visit as part of their package. If think you might the support you had before and during the birth to continue after the birth, you might consider hiring a postpartum doula.

My partner is going to be home for the first week after the birth and then we have family coming in for the two weeks after that. Won’t that be enough help?
Birth is often emotionally and physically strenuous for the partner as well. Your partner is also adjusting to a new role and may need time to recover a bit before going back to work.  Your postpartum doula can also show your partner ways to best support you.  And of course you may wish for extra help and support once your partner is back to work.

Grandparents can be a great help because they bring a fresh energy to the home— they did not just give birth! As your parents, they may know you better than any outsider can. But perhaps they would benefit from knowing the latest breastfeeding or even safe sleep research. Perhaps they are busy with the older sibling and can’t give as much time to the rest of your family. Or perhaps you find yourself feeling that even though they are there to help, you have to entertain them—a postpartum doula can help with this. Of course you may decide you do indeed have enough help initially but that you want a postpartum doula after everyone leaves.

When is the best time to hire a postpartum doula?
Once the interview process is complete, I like to meet with my families once prenatally to get a postpartum plan in order.  Usually this happens in the third trimester. Of course some families don’t decide they need a postpartum doula until after the baby is born, in which case you come up with the postpartum plan as we go.